Body
February 10, 2010
Posted by copley
Ever had a million dollar idea? A few years ago, my boyfriend was convinced he had struck imaginary gold with the idea of marrying a deodorant and hair removal product. “Think about it, you already rub something under your arms every morning; well this would eliminate the need for an extra step of shaving or waxing,” he explained to me, and anyone else who would listen. I countered with the fact that you would need a pretty potent chemical to burn off underarm stubble. Would you really want that sitting on your skin all day? Nevertheless, my words of warning could not deter him. But before he had time to source a mad scientist or file a patent, Unilever announced the launch of a revolutionary hair-minimizing deodorant. Read more...
January 20, 2010
Posted by copley
Have you ever wondered what you would look like post-plastic surgery? Do you think about the shape of your nose or the fullness of your lips constantly? Do you own an iPhone or iPod Touch? If the answer to these questions is – YES! – then you might be in luck, because Board-certified, Miami-based plastic surgeon Dr. Michael Salzhauer, has just released his much-anticipated app, iSurgeon. According to Dr. Salzhauer’s people, iSurgeon is “the most advanced beauty makeover app available in the iTunes App store,” combining personal image modification with high-tech gaming functionality. Beauty and gaming together at long last? Say it ain’t so. Read more...
January 19, 2010
Posted by marta
Our story on the Anti-Wrinkle Decollete bra for preventing cleavage crinkles was picked up by the news agency AFP and was run on the Fox News website amongst other places along with another new wonder bra find: The Smart Memory Bra from Slovenia’s Lisca, which boasts cups made of memory foam that ebbs and flows with body-heat — a NASA patented technology from the 1960s.
Why? I’ve been thinking quite hard about this. Perhaps The Memory Bra is for single women or those with indifferent partners and who want something, even if its inanimate, to remember their breasts. At all. Never mind fondly. Why would the cups “ebb and flow” with body heat? I haven’t noticed that my breasts change size depending on whether I am hot or cold. But maybe I just hadn’t noticed. Read more...
December 28, 2009
Posted by marta
It was only a matter of time before Canadian skincare company Euoko would make it back into TIA’s Dept of Daft. After launching Euoko W-31 Extreme White Concentrate Ampoules at a cost to the gullible beauty junkie of $8,520 a year, it has come up with the infinitely more reasonably priced Fractional Neck Lift Concentrate for $45o a pop. This is an extraordinary bargain when you appreciate that Euoko didn’t just go to the ends of the earth to find the best antiaging products, but to our very solar system to bring back rocks from Mars.
The ingredients list for Euoko’s neck cream includes, wait for it, “Discovered-on-Mars Iron Rose Crystal from Effusive Magma Rock in Hydrothermal Seams”. Of course it does. Euoko isn’t just out there. It’s in outer space. Read more...
December 8, 2009
Posted by marta
So you thought Madonna stayed young and gorgeous with the help of the odd nip and tuck? Nope, she’s got an antiaging iPhone app. Want one too? In early 2010, the iPhone will become indispensible to boomers with the ‘AntiAgingApp’, supposed to reduce wrinkles, cellulite and hair loss.
The $2.99 application, which will be sold on iTunes, aims to sucker hapless baldies and wrinklies by making them think their phone is emitting color, light and sound therapy to “heal” wrinkles, acne, cellulite, joint pain, sleep disorders and stimulate hair growth. Ten more applications, for $0.99 each, will be launched for individual “treatments”.
If the AntiAgingApp makes you even more addicted to your iPhone, help is at hand from Clarins. A couple of years ago, Clarins launched Expertise 3P, a potion that protects cell phone users from “electromagnetic waves” (until, that is, the British Advertising Standards Authority told Clarins its claims were ridiculous).
